First off, once again we have pushed the article back another week. We are going to talk about it this week people:) No, because of the response of several people who could not make it, we agreed to leave the article of Mother Teresa until next Wed.
So what happened this week? Well, as the title implies, it was (in this reporters personal opinion) pretty personal. We talked openly and honestly about some things going on in our lives. This was a very good night of conversation!
However, this makes recapping the meeting hard because of our agreement that what is said that is personal stays within the group. So this blog post will be open that anyone who wants to share something that we talked about that was personal to them, please feel free to place that in the comment section. That way it will be your own words and discretion.
One topic we did discuss that was more general was the fact that, even in the postmodern/emergent/ supposedly free to express your beliefs, world, there is polarization. There is now, like the more traditional mainstream realm, a seemingly left and a right (or maybe an up and down since the terms left and right wing is modern lingo). That just shows how much more important our group is (based on respect, freedom, exploration, and discussion), and how much of a need there is for something like what we are doing!
In addition, I will link one thing we talked about, because Mary talks about it on her own blog. We spent time discussing this issue in our own lives.
If you weren't present, this would be a really good post for any topics/questions that you would like to share to begin conversation about that. There has been a couple of discussions that some have had that may want to open to the group? That is always an option! So, just like Wed. night...wherever the winds may take us!
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4 comments:
I mention this in Mary's comment section, but I wanted to openly say what we were talking about when we ended with me.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm depressed. I mean it wouldn't be uncommon for someone who has been kicked out of their church job to be depressed. It was what I spent sooo many years preparing for! It was my passion and my identity that was thrown away.
At first I felt really close to God because I left not comprimising my beliefs in my perception of God... Mainly in the "loving your neighbor" command (which I was under the impression that that command was a given in churches...my bad!)
Now, as Alison has pointed out (not in a bad way, but in our open and honest relationship) that I have become more sarcastic, and very intense! I can't seem to relax, I'm in a constant state of defense, response, and pointed sarcasm towards status quo Christianity.
Is this healthy? I'll be the first to admit that when we talked about polarization, that I have as of late, been guilty of playing into that in the blogging realm.
once emancipated from my former church, I was energized by the freedom I now had to worship God as I was experiencing him without the rigidity of the institution. The interesting comment that was made by both my wife and Jeff was that perhaps it is that same freedom that now holds me down (or rather I hold myself down with). I've been so institutionalized, and God has been so systematized in my life, that I've always had to worship my understanding of him somehow within the modern/institutional/structured framework. Now that I have been set free, I don't know how to go about working with God in that freedom.?!?. Gave me something to think about.
My life is yours to critique:)
I'm glad to share this time in my life...this "dark time" (to forshadow next week's topic) with my new and beloved community! thank you all for allowing me to be myself with you!
love
justin
i posted this in response to justin's comment on my blog but thought i'd move it over here as well...
we often think that grief is limited to the death of someone...a new book out on counseling children/adolescents through grief and loss defines it this way: "grief is an inevitable, never-ending process that results from a permanent or temporary disruption in a routine, a separation, or a change in a relationship that may be beyond the person's control. this disruption, change or separation causes pain and discomfort and impacts the persons thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Al though loss is a universal experience, the causes and manifestations of it are unique to each individual and may change over time."
that is one of the best, most comprehensive definitions of grief i have seen in awhile.
i think the fallacy in the stages of grief model is that it seems to be pretty cut and dry...a series of stages you reach, sort of like a relay race, with clear-cut beginnings and an ending. and it's usually not that clean and easy...nor does it ever really end in many cases. it will still come up in some manner because it gets woven into the fabric of your being. i do like the analogy to an oriental rug...as they are handmade, there are bound to be some mistakes along the way, but the artist weaves that into the overall design of the rug (tapestries are the same way) and it simply becomes built into a beautiful work of art.
i very much appreciate the deviation from the plan last wednesday...it was good to hear where people are, to take off the masks a little more and to have a safe place to share our pearls...because so often i feel like people don't "get it" and i'm "casting my pearls among swine." i add my thanks for being a place that's ok dealing with our respective shadows.
I really like that definition. I think it's the best definition I've heard/read/seen in any of my psych. or counseling books/classes!
I really like what you said about grief being messy, but in psychology (which as we have understood it and experienced it)is taught and understood in a modern mindset. Modernity, being rooted in logic and scientific method, is the ONLY way we seem to understand the sciences (psych. being a science).
I sometimes wonder what postmodernity will do to the field of science? But I digress, my point is simply that grief is not the nice, neat, clean, systematic steps we have always been taught. I think that it is an understanding of the grieving process, but, as per your definition, Alison and I have talked about the "stages" of grief with me losing my job.
Sometimes we can't find where one stage ends and another begins. Sometimes we think i'm through one stage, only to digress back to another stage.
I think fowler's "stages of faith" are the same way. There is no real line to cross definitively showing that you have moved from one "stage to another". I like you tapestry analogy. I think it works well. Something Old to embody something new. If that isn't a great example of the beauty of the transitioning worldview in our faith, i'm not sure what is!
PS I also am glad that we deviated on wed. That should always be an option, and that (in my humble opinion) should always be the focus of the group. Hopefully we will have more and more moments like that, and less planned topics! I am glad that the people in this group allow us to be who we are. It wouldn't work otherwise! It is not where we meet, when we meet, or what we are called; it is truly the people that make this group special!!!!
so I second that thanks!
Jeff Lail visited with us this past wed. He mentions us, and some thoughts as a result of Wed. Night intersecting with his life in his blog post. Posted with permission.
Check it out:
http://www.life-inmotion.com/2007/10/its-been-exhausting-week.html
Thanks Jeff!
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